Day 246 of 365 - Harmonious Aging
Fear of getting older, having an aging and less functional body, and dying are common. Our anti-aging culture fosters fear and creates an imbalanced perspective about aging. It supports avoiding and not confronting our mortality. The fact is, we are all going to die sometime. More important is how we live, even as we age and suffer loss.
The key to skillful aging, according to a sociology study is: 'a balanced outlook toward old age - following the natural cycles of one's body; maintaining tranquility of mind; cultivating a sense of harmony with oneself and one's surroundings; and, gaining the wisdom of handling challenges and thus making adaptations accordingly'.
Reading that 77 Questions book was a bit of a wake up call for me on how I have viewed getting old. My perspective on elderly people from my past was, that they became 'old' earlier than we do now. With all their health problems they lost their independence. They either died younger or, needed to live in supported situations like senior or nursing homes where they existed in regimented and lonely lives, taking pill after pill until they died.
As a Baby Boomer, with all our modern medical, health and wellness resources, I was determined that was not going to happen to me. (My mom died at age 62 of heart disease.) So far, so good as I am in my 65th year and in pretty good health. I have to say, it is now also true for me to see much healthier and more active people in their 70's, 80's and even 90's. Most of them still live in their own homes or apartments independently.
At the same time, there seem to be more people developing chronic health problems at an earlier age. As was discussed in a previous post, nowadays we don't need to worry so much about dying younger, but it's more likely we will live longer with chronic disease.
I suppose the wake up for me is in accepting the natural cycles of life and the gradual tendency of the body to wear out. I don't fear death itself, but I do fear chronic illness and disability. My efforts have been concentrated on avoiding that. But, part of living in an aging body is acknowledging that I will, by natural laws, become more vulnerable to disease over time. What will likely be more required of me is an openness to seeking and accepting support and help from others.
What Dr. Finkelstein was trying to convey, along with that acceptance of inevitably having to experience suffering and loss is, that we do not need to resign ourselves to the 'it's all downhill from here' mentality. Instead, it's possible to convert negative experiences into motivation for generating more resiliency. Resilience is about rolling with changes and adapting.
It's still important to channel energy into effective prevention, but to also look at life, and even death, as a great adventure. His emphasis on paying attention to environment and natural cycles helps with perspective. Health is not just the absence of disease and I don't need to always be trying to control things.
This quote from another author, Rumer Godden, is also a good reminder about a holistic approach to my life. 'There is an Indian proverb or axiom that says that everyone is a house with four rooms, a physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room everyday, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person.'
May I learn to age more harmoniously.
The key to skillful aging, according to a sociology study is: 'a balanced outlook toward old age - following the natural cycles of one's body; maintaining tranquility of mind; cultivating a sense of harmony with oneself and one's surroundings; and, gaining the wisdom of handling challenges and thus making adaptations accordingly'.
Reading that 77 Questions book was a bit of a wake up call for me on how I have viewed getting old. My perspective on elderly people from my past was, that they became 'old' earlier than we do now. With all their health problems they lost their independence. They either died younger or, needed to live in supported situations like senior or nursing homes where they existed in regimented and lonely lives, taking pill after pill until they died.
As a Baby Boomer, with all our modern medical, health and wellness resources, I was determined that was not going to happen to me. (My mom died at age 62 of heart disease.) So far, so good as I am in my 65th year and in pretty good health. I have to say, it is now also true for me to see much healthier and more active people in their 70's, 80's and even 90's. Most of them still live in their own homes or apartments independently.
At the same time, there seem to be more people developing chronic health problems at an earlier age. As was discussed in a previous post, nowadays we don't need to worry so much about dying younger, but it's more likely we will live longer with chronic disease.
I suppose the wake up for me is in accepting the natural cycles of life and the gradual tendency of the body to wear out. I don't fear death itself, but I do fear chronic illness and disability. My efforts have been concentrated on avoiding that. But, part of living in an aging body is acknowledging that I will, by natural laws, become more vulnerable to disease over time. What will likely be more required of me is an openness to seeking and accepting support and help from others.
What Dr. Finkelstein was trying to convey, along with that acceptance of inevitably having to experience suffering and loss is, that we do not need to resign ourselves to the 'it's all downhill from here' mentality. Instead, it's possible to convert negative experiences into motivation for generating more resiliency. Resilience is about rolling with changes and adapting.
It's still important to channel energy into effective prevention, but to also look at life, and even death, as a great adventure. His emphasis on paying attention to environment and natural cycles helps with perspective. Health is not just the absence of disease and I don't need to always be trying to control things.
This quote from another author, Rumer Godden, is also a good reminder about a holistic approach to my life. 'There is an Indian proverb or axiom that says that everyone is a house with four rooms, a physical, a mental, an emotional and a spiritual. Most of us tend to live in one room most of the time, but unless we go into every room everyday, even if only to keep it aired, we are not a complete person.'
May I learn to age more harmoniously.
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