Day 104 of 365 - Mending Tears and Changing Habits
Today I attempted to mend a couple of small tears in a fitted bedsheet. I was aware of one small tear last week, but thought it could wait until laundry day for fixing. Of course it became bigger. Then, when I took the sheet off the bed today I found another small one. At first, I had thought these were due to catching on something in the washer or dryer, but after looking more closely I think it is just wear and tear (pun intended).
In my sewing basket I rediscovered some iron-on mending tape and decided to use that. It requires a hot, dry iron to set the adhesive. In that process, I scorched the sheet! Into the wash it went anyway, for the test of seeing if it could hold during a wash and dry cycle. So far, so good. We'll see how long it lasts, but it would probably be a good idea to start looking for a replacement sheet.
What does all this nonsense have to do with changing habits? Well, in the funny way that my brain sometimes works, it seemed like another good metaphor.
We usually don't want to change our habits until some event forces the issue. We may be well aware that some behavior we engage in is not serving us, but it has become entrenched. In a way, it's also comfortable, because it's very familiar. Besides, change can be hard and often is uncomfortable. It takes work and practice.
That's why we may start out with the best of intentions to create some new and positive behavior, but, before too long we are derailed by life stress or self-sabotage. And, back down into the rabbit hole of the familiar we go.
I can be stubborn about trying to 'fix' something or 'make do', and it is not unusual for me to end up making a botch of it. My mother used the term 'pig-headed', which seems insulting to pigs, who I thought were intelligent animals. Nevertheless, my desire to make something keep working for me can end up being messy. (Just ask my husband about the time I tried to move a clog in a sink drain by 'tapping' with a wrench on what turned out to be a chrome pipe and breaking it.)
It turns out that there is good science to explain why we develop and want to keep our old habits, even if they do not serve us. And, there are also methods that teach us a different way of going about change. It is by going from the inside out, rather than the outside in. In other words, often if we just try to force ourselves to change a behavior, it won't stick. That's because the way we think and feel about it on the inside has not really changed.
To quote from the book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself - "if you make the effort to change your inner world of thoughts and feelings, your external environment should begin to give you feedback to show you that your mind has had an effect on your 'outer' world." As this quote says, there is still effort and practice involved, but chances of success are likely higher and more lasting.
In my case, I could become more comfortable with just letting something go when it has passed the point of being functional or useful, rather than perseverating about it. Also, I would ask sooner for outside support and help, instead of feeling like I need to do everything myself. (I am not opposed to repairing and recycling, but I hope you see my point.)
All this relates to the mental aspect of health and vitality, which will be addressed more in future posts.
In my sewing basket I rediscovered some iron-on mending tape and decided to use that. It requires a hot, dry iron to set the adhesive. In that process, I scorched the sheet! Into the wash it went anyway, for the test of seeing if it could hold during a wash and dry cycle. So far, so good. We'll see how long it lasts, but it would probably be a good idea to start looking for a replacement sheet.
What does all this nonsense have to do with changing habits? Well, in the funny way that my brain sometimes works, it seemed like another good metaphor.
We usually don't want to change our habits until some event forces the issue. We may be well aware that some behavior we engage in is not serving us, but it has become entrenched. In a way, it's also comfortable, because it's very familiar. Besides, change can be hard and often is uncomfortable. It takes work and practice.
That's why we may start out with the best of intentions to create some new and positive behavior, but, before too long we are derailed by life stress or self-sabotage. And, back down into the rabbit hole of the familiar we go.
I can be stubborn about trying to 'fix' something or 'make do', and it is not unusual for me to end up making a botch of it. My mother used the term 'pig-headed', which seems insulting to pigs, who I thought were intelligent animals. Nevertheless, my desire to make something keep working for me can end up being messy. (Just ask my husband about the time I tried to move a clog in a sink drain by 'tapping' with a wrench on what turned out to be a chrome pipe and breaking it.)
It turns out that there is good science to explain why we develop and want to keep our old habits, even if they do not serve us. And, there are also methods that teach us a different way of going about change. It is by going from the inside out, rather than the outside in. In other words, often if we just try to force ourselves to change a behavior, it won't stick. That's because the way we think and feel about it on the inside has not really changed.
To quote from the book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself - "if you make the effort to change your inner world of thoughts and feelings, your external environment should begin to give you feedback to show you that your mind has had an effect on your 'outer' world." As this quote says, there is still effort and practice involved, but chances of success are likely higher and more lasting.
In my case, I could become more comfortable with just letting something go when it has passed the point of being functional or useful, rather than perseverating about it. Also, I would ask sooner for outside support and help, instead of feeling like I need to do everything myself. (I am not opposed to repairing and recycling, but I hope you see my point.)
All this relates to the mental aspect of health and vitality, which will be addressed more in future posts.
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